Fangirl Chronicles
by xXxXShadeXxXx
Summary: My friend and I wrote this. It has anime bishies, complete random funniness, oh, and did I mention BISHIES! See out inter anime adventures and laugh your head off! R&R! Not all TMM, tons of other animes as well.
1. Insanity and Fangirls

Mew Chi: Ok, me and my friend Kuroko wrote this. (not her real name)

Kuroko: I like cookies...

Kish: freak...

Samara: I like blood...

Mew Chi: I hate you all

Kuroko: (huggles Kish)

Mew Chi: (wacks Kuroko on the head with a broom) HEY! He's MINE!

Kish: WTF...

Mew Chi: (pushes Kuroko away and hugs Kish)

Kish: crazy evil fangirls

Kuroko: I love him more!

Mew Chi: I made a website all about him! Plus you also like Inuyasha, Gaara, Sasuke, Sesshomaru, Ed, Ryou, Kyo, Yuki, Lee, wow you like a lot of anime guys...I on the other hand am a Kish fangirl only.

Gaara: (appears out of nowhere) you like me?!

Kuroko: (huggles Gaara)(drools) YES!

Gaara: (controls sand) Back away or else...

Kuroko: fine (crosses arms angrily)

Mew Chi: wow, this is a long conversation...I guess I don't need to add a story to this

Kuroko: Cool! More time with Gaara!

Gaara: (backs away slowly and runs away)

Kuroko: WAIT GAARA! I LOVE YOU!! (chases after Gaara)

Mew Chi: Creepy...

Samara: YOU'RE NO BETTER! You're obsessed with a green haired alien!

Mew Chi: A sexy green haired alien... : )

Kish: I'm still here you know

Mew Chi: Why do you love Ichigo!? All she ever does is reject you!

Kuroko: (returns covered in sand) Gaara tried to kill me... (sob)

Samara: That's what you get for loving a sand demon...wait, he _is_ a demon...HES MINE!!

Mew Chi: Ok...I'm officially creeped out now.

Samara: (runs in the direction Gaara went)

Kuroko: (runs after her) No, HES MINE!!

Kish: Samara is a fangirl...fandemon too?

Mew Chi: Anime guys are so much cuter...

Kish: I'm just gonna go now (runs away)

(Kuroko and Samara return, covered in sand...and blood)

Samara: You know what? Never mind, you can have him.

Kuroko: ...I still like him.

Inuyasha: (crashes through door) Where is Sesshomaru!?

Kuroko: (hearts in eyes) INUYASHA!! (huggles Inuyasha)

Mew Chi: I must find Kish! (runs off to search for him)

Gaara: What? You don't love me anymore? (sobs and runs away bawling)

Inuyasha: What? Ok, I guess I'm just gonna go now...

Kuroko: NO! Don't go! Wait...OSUWARI!!

Inuyasha: Haha, it only works when Kagome says it, and she's not here right now!

Kagome: (appears out of nowhere) Innnuyaashhaaa...OSUWARI!!

Inuyasha: (crashes to the ground) (twitch...twitch...twitch)

Mew Chi: (comes back dragging Kish by the ear) Woah, what happened here?

Kuroko: Gaara's jealous, Inuyasha's twitching and in pain, and Kagome's angry.

Samara: Wow, there's a lot of strange people here.

Kish: Why'd you have to drag me back here!?

Mew Chi: Because I am a crazy rabid fangirl that is not going to let you leave so easily...

Samara: You have a condition that can't be helped Mew Chi.

Kagome: (drags Inuyasha by the leg all the way back to their realm)

Inuyasha: (digs claws in to the floor) NOOOO!!

Kuroko: NOOO!! How dare you take him away from me you-

Masaya: (appears out of nowhere)

Kuroko: It's MASAYA!! Let's kill him! (takes out shuriken)

Mew Chi: (pulls out duel blades) sounds good

Samara: (sharpens claws) MWAHAHA

Kish: (pulls out dragon swords) With pleasure

Gaara: (crashes through door) Kill? Sounds good. (controls sand)

Taruto: What? Why am I here? Wait, an angry mob? COOL! (pulls out weapon toy thing...)

Masaya: (gulp) Ummmm...guys?

angry mob: (attacks Masaya)

Masaya: AAAGGGHHHH!!!

Masaya fanclub: (swoops in on vine through window) We'll save you Masaya! (grabs battered Masaya and jumps out of the window, fall eight stories to their death)

Mew Chi: wow...this is by far the strangest thing I've ever written or heard...

Pudding: (comes in and sees Taruto) TARU-TARU!!!

Taruto: AK! Get away you annoying monkey girl!

Pudding: AWWW! Somebody needs a hu-ug...

Taruto: NOOO!!! (tries to jump out window but remembers the Masaya fangirls and runs back in to the room and comes face to face with Pudding)

Pudding: I still got a hug in me...

Taruto: NOOOO!!! (gets hugged by Pudding)

Mew Chi: Awwww, you know you like her deep down.

Kish: Yeah, it's so obvious.

Kuroko: How cute.

Taruto: I loathe you ALL.

Santa: (crashes down through chimney) HOHOHO! ou've all been very naughty children.

Mew Chi: Who you callin' a child fat man! I happen to be a demon!

Kuroko: Hey...since we couldn't kill Masaya, let's kill this dude!!!!

(mob forms again)

Santa: HOHO...ho? (tries to run but is too fat and slow and trips over fat roll)

Mew Chi: It's a giant fatroll! Maybe it's friendly!

Samara: what?

Kuroko: It's an inside joke. You wouldn't understand.

Kish: I do not want to understand.

(Santa jumps out window but does not die because of fat, instead, fat acts as padding/bounciness. He bounces all the way back to the north pole)

Mew Chi: ok...I'm just going to end this chapter now...Ja Ne.

Samara: Please leave a review for our stupidity

Kuroko: And remember kids, an apple a day keeps the hobos away!

Everyone: WHAT!? Oh well (begins to sing the happy song)

Gaara: I love you ! You love me! We're a great big family! (way offtone)

Everyone: STFU! You sing badly!

Gaara: (cries)


	2. Thumb wars and Twister of DOOOOM!

Mew Chi: Hello again. It is me, Mew Chi, back again, I wonder if we will _ever_ start our story.

Kuroko: And me, I am helping again. Also, Mew Chi, the crackers are talking to me again, MAKE IT STOP!

Samara: Did you take your medecine today??

Kuroko: (points and giggles at ground) heehee...look at all the little munchkins.

Kish: (looks creeped out) Is she okay?

Mew Chi: I ask myself that all the time. Also today, we are going to have another guest...SOKKA from Avatar!

Sokka: What the...WAIT! Why am I here? Where's Appa!?

Kuroko: YES! It's Sokka! (hugs Sokka)

Mew Chi: Hey Sokka, remember the cactus juice incident?

Sokka: Don't remind me. (sees Kish) Finally! A guy that has bigger ears than me!

Kish: (glares at Sokka) I am an alien. Everyone on my planet has big ears, you however are human, so shutup!

Mew Chi: Oh no...This could get bad, but at least it's entertaining.

Samara: I'll go make some popcorn.

Kuroko: And I'll get the CANDY!!

Kish and Sokka: (glaring at each other)

Sokka: Baka...

Kish: Dumbo...

Sokka: Well, I bet I'm a better warrior.

Kish: I bet I'm better at a thumb war.

Sokka: You're on!

(Kuroko and Samara come back with snacks)

Kuroko: Did we miss anything?

Mew Chi: Nope, they're just about to start a thumb war.

Samara: Good, let's watch.

Kish and Sokka: 1, 2, 3, 4 I declare a thumb war, 5, 6, 7, 8, Try to keep your thumb straight. (begin to thumb wrestle)

Mew Chi: Okay, I'm taking bets!

Kuroko: 5 dollars on Sokka!

Samara: 10 dollars on Kish!

Kish: (while thumb wrestling digs long nail in to Sokka's hand) HA!

Sokka: AGGHH! Why you little...(hits Kish on the head with a club)

Mew Chi: Oh no! You didn't just hit Kish! You are gonna pay big time! Time for our next guest...CHEESE from Foster's home for imaginary friends.

Cheese: Egg nog has feelings too

Sokka: What is that thing!?

Mew Chi: CHEESE! Annoy him to death!

Cheese: Okaaaaay... (stand around and does nothing)

Mew Chi: Now please...

Cheese: I'm a llama...watch me frolick...

Kish: (wakes up from 3 minute coma) I hate you...(points at Sokka)

Sokka: (stares transfixed at Cheese)

Cheese: I HAVE DISLEXIA!!

Mew Chi: Okay, this isn't working, Cheese go home...

Cheese: Okaaaaay... (walks away babbling about accordians) TOILET PLUNGERS!!

Mew Chi: okay then...moving on, Cheese didn't annoy Sokka to death like I hoped, luckily...I have Jigsaw from Saw's phone number!

Kuroko: I think that dude wants to kill me...

Samara: Just like Gaara

Mew Chi: (on phone) Hey Jigsaw, kill any people lately?...That's good, can you come over here, I need some help...Really? Thanks. See ya. (hangs up) Ok, Jigsaw will be here any-

Jigsaw: (appears) hey, need some help?

Mew Chi: Yes. (points at Sokka) I need help with him.

Jigsaw: Okay, give me a moment to set up the game.

Mew Chi: Arigato. Also Kuroko, go help Jigsaw, since you know _everything_ about Sokka.

Kuroko: Do I have to...?

Kish: Yes, or else I will steal the candy.

Kuroko: Not the candy! Ok I'll help.

Samara: Make sure he doesn't kill you.

Sokka: Do I get ANY say in this?!!

Everyone: No. (binds and gags victim)

Jigsaw: the game is set up and ready! Sokka- you have to drink 11 glasses of cactus juice before this here "killer" food consumes your toenails and/or head.

Mew Chi: you usually do a lot worse than that..

Sokka: (muffled) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (gets put into empty room with cactus juice and a killer cheeseburger, which is unable to get him for the time being because it is locked in a metal cage.)

Jigsaw: Sokka, you have 1 minute to consume this cactus juice before we let this food out of it's cage. Time's ticking, start drinking.

Sokka: (tries to drink the cactus juice but begins to hallucinate after 3rd glass...) Oooohhhh, pretty colors...What does this button do...? (pokes killer cheeseburger through bars of cage)

Mew Chi: He's doomed...(eats popcorn)

Killer Cheeseburger: (bites Sokka's finger)

Sokka: BAD TOPH! No more coffee for you!

Samara: 10 seconds left, he is as good as dead...COOL!

Katara: (bursts in through door riding penguin) I'll save you Sokka! (pulls him away from cheeseburger and run towards door.

Sokka: (sees penguin) Is this your new boyfriend Katara?

Penguin: (stares blankly at Sokka)

(Katara and Sokka escape with penguin)

Mew Chi: awww man, now what?

(Gaara, the person that Kuroko worships, comes crashing through window)

Gaara: ACK! Evil fangirls.. they just don't know when to stop chasing someone...

Kuroko: Gaara.. YOU CAME BACK FOR ME!!!!!!!! (huggles Gaara harder than ever before.)

Samara:(forgives Gaara for nearly killing her with a sand coffin, pushes Kuroko away from him,and gives him a giant, huggly huggle)

( Ok, before you think of Samara being the evil girl from the ring, this Samara is actually a cat demon that lives with Mew Chi, just saying...)

Kuroko: (has an angry expression and hugs Gaara harder, therefore Gaara cannot breathe)

Gaara: THAT'S IT!! (puts Kuroko and Samara in sand coffin) DIE!! (Sand collapses inward squeezing Kuroko and Samara)

Mew Chi: (holds umbrella over her head to keep blood off) This could get ugly...

(sand coffin squeezes in and blood explodes from the victims everywhere)

Kuroko and Samara: AAAGGGHHH!!

Mew Chi: Wow, I'm glad I had that umbrella...too bad Kish wasn't as lucky...Kuroko, Samara, are you guys okay?!

Kish: (is covered in blood) ew...

Kuroko and Samara: We're not dead...but we're in a lot of pain...

Kuroko: GAARA!! You baka!...But I still love you...

Samara: I can't say the same...

Gaara: (still looks peeved) Dang it! You guys just don't die, do you?

Mew Chi: No. And now it's time for EXTREME TWISTER!!!

Everyone: YEAY!!

Kuroko: (sets up twister mat)

Gaara: (stretches and prepares for brutal pain)

Mew Chi: It's extreme because it is much harder and much more painful than regular Twister.

Kuroko: yea, you get to use things like,... ears, lips, nose, and tongue...

Samara: Quite an interesting...and painful game.

Jigsaw: Can I play? And can I use this torture technique in Saw 4?

Mew Chi: Yes, and sure, let's begin...(spins spinny thing) Nose to blue...

Everyone: (touch their noses to a blue circle, however there are not enough circles...so people have to share...)

Samara: Jigsaw!! Your mask is in my personal space!

Jigsaw: Sorry, I'm not taking off my mask!

Kuroko: GAARA! Your sand got in my eye!

Gaara: Don't make me put you in another sand coffin!

Mew Chi: okaayyy...(spins) Left ear red...

Everone but Kish and Kuroko: WHAT!?

Kish: Hey this is easy...

Samara: because you're a big eared alien baka!!

Gaara: Kuroko, your ear is in my eye (Kuroko is an alien too)

Kuroko: sorry, but I refuse to lose!

Mew Chi: Left elbow orange...

Gaara: WHAT! wait (uses sand as an extension of arm)

Samara: HEY! That's cheating!

Gaara: no it's not, I am **one** with the sand!!

Kish: (falls over and twitches in pain) owwwwwwww!

Samara: haha! You lose!

Kish: (leaves the game and sulks in corner)

Mew Chi: 1 down, 4 to go...Lips to yellow...

Kuroko: ...Lips to Gaara!!?

Gaara: (throws Kuroko off play mat) Stay away you crazy freak!!!

Jigsaw: I wouldn't even use this against my victims, it's too cruel...

Mew Chi: Everyone! Right eye to green!

Everyone: (somehow get their eyes across the mat, use your imagination) AAGHH! The pain!

Kuroko: (Looks at spinning board) Mew Chi, there is no eye on that...

Mew Chi: SSSHHH! I know, but it's more fun this way...

Kish: You are a cruel and unusual person...

Mew Chi: Spleen to red!!

Everyone: O.o WHAT!?

Mew Chi: If you guys need scalpels I can lend you some...

Everyone: Forget it, we are not playing this anymore!

Mew Chi: Fine, ruin all this fun...

Gaara: (puts eye back in socket) FUN?! This is just pain!

Mew Chi: What's more fun than that!?

Samara: Even I can't stand it...

Mew Chi: (laughs evilly) WOW, it's late, time to end this chapter, bye!

Kuroko: Gaara loves me, very very very very very very very very very very very deep down inside, I'm sure of it! And I love him back!

Gaara: What!? No I don't!

Kish: For once I'm one of the most sane people in the room!

Jigsaw: Also, (points at (Insertyour name here)I'm coming for you next, and I have a special game for you...TWISTER EXTREME OR YOUR LIFE!

Samara: Cat's rule! Dog's drool!

Inuyasha: HEY! I heard that!

Mew Chi: Why are you here?! Get out before Kuroko sees you!

Inuyasha: (runs away)

Kuroko: Was that Inuyasha...?

Mew Chi: No, oh look at the time, see you next time kids, and remember R&R! Or Gaara will find you...or even worse...Kuroko!!


	3. Lemons and Passionfruits!

**Mew Chi: HI!!!! Anyways, time for the next chapter. This was just an ordinary conversation that had gone wrong, and I just decided to put it here, also FY!**

**Shade: Mew Chi**

**Silverstar: Kuroko**

**Fallenpaw is a new character, one of my friends who happened to be in the conversation **

**I'd switch the names but I'm too lazy, deal with it. Anyways, this chapter is called A Citric Conversation, it is a debate between the fruits and the...fanfiction version of lemons/limes, etc...

* * *

**

**Shade**: i like pie

**Shade**: pie is good

**Fallenpaw**: blaaaahhhhh i feel sick

**Shade**: peach, pecan...

**Fallenpaw**: pai sucks

**Shade**: apple, cinnamon

**Fallenpaw**: cherry, blueberry

**Shade**: chocolate, lemon

**Shade**: coconut cream

**Fallenpaw**: rasberry

**Shade**: chicken pot pie!

**Fallenpaw**: boca pot pie!

**Silverstar**: don't say lemon in front of me!!! (shudder)

**Bramblefur**: cuz i g2g

**Bramblefur**: lemon!

**Shade**: haha whispers LEEEEEMMMMOOOONNNN!

**Bramblefur**: lol

**Fallenpaw**: Q: i know what a lemon is, but what is a lime?

**Silverstar**: **http://www.devianta 70595/?qo5&qlemon+ fanfic&qhboost3Apo pular+agesigma3A24 h+agescale3A5**

**Silverstar**: look at the deviantart thing!!!!

**Shade**: i did, lol

**Fallenpaw**: what is a lime?

**Shade**: why did they call them lemons???

**Shade**: a lime is like a lemon, but not as strong I think

**Shade**: haha, one could think we were talking about fruits not knowing the context of the situation

**Fallenpaw**: or is a lime one step up?

**Fallenpaw**: you know...

**Fallenpaw**: lol!!

**Shade**: umm, i think lemon is the highest it can go

**Fallenpaw**: so is a lime one step down?

**Shade**: a lime is a step down without any real "penetration" I think, I dont know

**Fallenpaw**: lemons are serious and limes are at drunken partys?

**Silverstar**: what about orange and grapefruit?

**Shade**: (twitches)

**Fallenpaw**: or could it refer to gender?

**Silverstar**: is there such thing?

**Fallenpaw**: what doi u mean?

**Shade**: umm, no, it doesnt refer to gender

**Silverstar**: grapefruit...

**Fallenpaw**: r u sure?

**Shade**: a lime is a lemon with lemonic content but without "penetration..." but im not sure, im just guessing

**Shade**: how the hell am I supposed to know!?

**Fallenpaw**: great job.

**Fallenpaw**: ur writing one!

**Fallenpaw**: its a lemon on ur own home computer!

**Shade**: no im not! im too innocent to write one big chibi eyes

**Fallenpaw**: a lemon on paper!

**Fallenpaw**: a lemon on your deask!

**Fallenpaw**: desk

**Fallenpaw**: at home! at school! at work!

**Shade**: im not wrting one...yet, (mind clicks) OH! YOU SICKO!

**Fallenpaw**: LOL!!!

**Fallenpaw**: ROTFL!!!

**Shade**: u have a sicker mind than me!

**Fallenpaw**: doubt it

**Shade**: maybe u should write one!

**Silverstar**: ewww...

**Shade**: heehee, citrus...

**Fallenpaw**: what do you mean? i am talking about fruit, i don't know what you are talking baout...

**Fallenpaw**: about

**Shade**: (bursts out laughing)

**Silverstar**: we shouldn't be writing lemons!!! we are still virgins for god's sake!!! (or at least I hope all of us are!!)

**Shade**: hahaha, citrus!!!

**Fallenpaw**: this is hilarious! where is streamkit? or is it Streampaw?

**Silverstar**: OMG!!

**Shade**: shes not on the internet right now

**Shade**: omg what?

**Shade**: pineapples!

**Fallenpaw**: shade, do us all a favor and clear this board!

**Silverstar**: this is a funneh topic but it's hentai!!!!

**Fallenpaw**: oh, pineapples are spiky and pointy!

**Silverstar**: ...umm, what?

**Fallenpaw**: they also have such sour fruit and make people cry!

**Shade**: rolls on the floor laughing Silverstar, why are u talking about hentai, we're just discussing citric fruits, silverstar, you sicko!

**Silverstar**: why are we talking about sour fruit??!!

**Silverstar**: ...freaks...

**Fallenpaw**: you know, pineapples...you can find them all the time at most stores! All season long!

**Shade**: because we like citric acid

**Silverstar**: ...

**Fallenpaw**: this is great, just so hilarious!

**Shade**: lemons, limes, oranges, grapefruits, pineapples!

**Silverstar**: if i think i know what your talking about... then ew.

**Fallenpaw**: NAVEL ORANGES!!!!

**Silverstar**: smacks forehead

**Fallenpaw**: seriously, its a real type

**Shade**: im saving this conversation on a word document

**Fallenpaw**: they are a bit bigger than normal ones, but much more juicy

**Silverstar**: whatev. if you can't beat em, join em!!

**Shade**: im gonna email it to streampaw, and ewwww, Fallenpaw, gross

**Fallenpaw**: I don't know what you are talking about, I 'm talking about fruit

**Fallenpaw**: good, healthy fruit!

**Fallenpaw**: yummy, delicious fruit! I love fruit!

**Silverstar**: ...citrus fruit.

**Shade**: heehee, lemons!

**Fallenpaw**: great.

**Shade**: haha, has brought new meaning to the word!

**Silverstar**: I think I like bananas... not very sour but have an aftertaste you won't soon forget!

**Fallenpaw**: thats just super...excuse me while i barf forevere

**Fallenpaw**: heave!

**Silverstar**: laughs

**Shade**: heehee, I think they should switch lemons with passionfruits

**Fallenpaw**: that makes more sense

**Shade**: wouldnt that make more sense?

**Shade**: yup

**Silverstar**: ...no, i like lemons better, you feel the sourness...

**Shade**: like "Beware, Passionfruit in chapter 20"

**Fallenpaw**: what about starfruit! starfruit is a citrus and we forgot that!

**Silverstar**: this is an interesting conversation...

**Fallenpaw**: Satrfruit is bumpy

**Silverstar**: OMG!!!! LOOOVE STARFRUIT!!!!

**Fallenpaw**: I am sooooo tired

**Shade**: thats what im gonna put from now on, I shall start a new craze through lemons will be no more, make way for passionfruit!

**Fallenpaw**: hey Silverstar, where do you live?

**Silverstar**: what about mangoes? they are sweet but have a hard pit...

**Silverstar**: what about mangoes? they are sweet but have a hard it...

**Silverstar**: colorado.

**Fallenpaw**: me 2

**Fallenpaw**: But mangoes smell funny and have a bad aftertaste

**Shade**: i like mangoes

**Silverstar**: no, lemons are better than passionfruit!!!

**Shade**: and i love passionfruits

**Fallenpaw**: lemons make lemonade

**Silverstar**: r we talking about fruit or...

**Shade**: no! passionfruit makes more sense for fanfictions and im not sure truly.

**Fallenpaw**: or what silverstar???

**Silverstar**: NO I LIKE LEMONS!!!!

**Fallenpaw**: or talking about what?

**Shade**: PASSIONFRUIT!

**Shade**: NOT LEMONS!

**Silverstar**: LEMONS!!!!!!!!

**Fallenpaw**: STARFRUIT!!!

**Shade**: PAAASSSSIIIOOOONNNFR RRUUUIIIITT!!!

**Silverstar**: passion fruit will make adults wonder.

**Silverstar**: parents?!

**Fallenpaw**: hm, good point

**Silverstar**: lemons don't give it away as much!

**Fallenpaw**: Score: Silverstar: one Shade: one

**Shade**: well, kids wont even be looking at the mature section with their parents near!

**Fallenpaw**: Lets call it a tie and move on shall we?

**Shade**: and passionfruit makes more sense and sounds better!

**Shade**: neva!

**Silverstar**: lemons!

**Shade**: passionfruit!

**Silverstar**: ...sigh I give up on U!!!

**Fallenpaw**: thank u 4 being mature

**Silverstar**: whatever, don't be writing passion fruits either!!!

**Shade**: i dont even know if were talking about or the actual fruit, either way, passionfruit wins

**Silverstar**: ...I'm scared...

**Fallenpaw**: cha, whatever

**Shade**: im not mature, deal with it

**Fallenpaw**: cha, I knew that

**Silverstar**: I think i was talking about... never mind...

**Fallenpaw**: Lets go to Riverclan, we've already dirtied this board enough

**Fallenpaw**: OR ARE U 2 TOO BUSY LOOKING UP LEMONS TO COME????????

* * *

**Mew Chi: And that is where the conversation ended. Can anyone tell me the difference between a lemon and a lime, and who thinks lemons should be called Passionfruits instead!?**

**Samara: Where was I, where was Kish, where was anyone!?**

**Mew Chi: Shut up you, this was the best conversation ever! I got 3 reviews, so I am continuing as I promised. I want 3 more reviews before you get the next chapter!**


	4. The Trip

Mew Chi: HIIIIIII!!!!!!!! My peoplez!! Today we are going to a very special place!

Kish: YAY!

Kuroko: FIELD TRIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Samara: Woopedy f------- doo….

Mew Chi: (eyes widen) OMG! You said a bad word!!! (Smacks Samara on the head with Kish plushy) Anyways, today we have a special guest! Haku from Narutooooooo!!!! BELIEVE IT!

Kish: (Thinks) _where did she get that plushy…?_

Haku: …..who are you? What am I doing here? Why can't I find my socks…?

Kuroko: (smells Haku's feet) (goes cross-eyed)

Mew Chi: (hits her in the head with a wii-mote)

Kuroko: What was that for!?!?!

Mew Chi: Don't smell people's feet! People don't like it when you intrude in their personal bubble… (eye twitches when she remembers bubble pop line (1))

Kuroko: …..fine….but since you're over him… (Glomps Kish)

Kish: 0.0….go die somewhere, will you?

Mew Chi: (glomps Haku) Happy hug day!!!!

Samara: You said something about a personal bubble…?

Haku: …..

Kish: (feels that he's losing his fangirls) (suddenly yells) they're stealing my fangirls away!!!!!!!!!!

Samara: Who's stealing your fangirls away?

Kish: The girly men!!! (Suddenly feels sharp pain in neck and passes out)

Samara: (stares at Haku) what did you do to him…?

Haku: (fire in eyes) (holds stack of needles) No. one. calls. me. girly. and gets away with it!!!!

Mew Chi: HES NOT GIRLY DAMMIT!!!!! (is yelling to self in corner)

Samara: ….wait…so Haku IS a GUY?!

Haku: (feels insulted)

Samara: But he's probably gay then…

Kuroko and Mew Chi: (tackle and strangle Samara)

Haku: I AM NOT GAY!!! I wear these clothes because in Japan men who look girly are considered attractive! I think of Zabuza as a father, I do not like Sasuke, or Naruto, and I sure as hell do not like Kakashi! (mutters something evil about yaoi fangirls)

Kish: So you are calling yourself girly! (removes needle from neck)

Haku: (blush)

Kish: (feels pain in head and falls to ground again)

Chi: (proudly holds giant llama statue after hitting Kish in the head) Say anything about him being girly again and you will DIE! Anyways, we should be talking about the field trip. We are going to visit the Ouran High School Host Club!!!!!!!!!!! Also if you do not know what that is and never watched the show Ouran High School Host Club I suggest you find it now on youtube and watch a few episodes so you know what's happening, it's the best show evah!!! Go now, I'll wait.

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Later

Mew Chi: (yawn) Finished? Good, let's go! On the bus everyone! (points to mini bus few centimeters away)

Everyone: (wonders) _How long has that been there…?_

Mew Chi: (mumbles something to self about the benefits of giant stretchy jeans) Let's go!

Everyone: (gets in Bus)

Kuroko: Who's gonna drive?

Kish: I'LL DRIVE!

Everyone: NO!

Kish: (pouts)

Mew Chi: I'd trust Samara's driving more than yours…

Samara: Really? Thanks Chi! (hops to steering wheel and begins to drive) (thinks) _Yes…but one problem…what do I do now, oh well, might as well wing it…_ (Starts to

drive)

Bus: (crashes through trees and daringly leaps over houses)

Mew Chi: SAMARA! I didn't actually mean for you to drive!

Samara: Be quiet woman! I'm driving!

Everyone but Kuroko: (screams frantically)

Kuroko: (screams over screaming) Maybe we should take a detour!

Mew Chi: (holding on to seat for dear life) Yes lets!

Kuroko: To the mall!!!

Everyone: …wait…WHAT!?!

Samara: (while driving hits numerous pedestrians) (laughs evilly)

Mew Chi: Samara! You hit a pedestrian!!!

Samara: What's your point…?

Kuroko: (grabs wheel from Samara and drives to mall) (thinks) _Wait…I don't know how to drive…_

Haku: (hyperventilating and holding tightly on to seatbelt)

Mew Chi: Kuroko- NOOO!!! We're here!!

Kuroko: (drives bus through mall's wall) (looks around department store)

Samara: Well…we're here!

Mew Chi: Let's go look around and shop, like totally! (valley girl mode)

Kish and Haku: (hugging each other still scared, then glance at each other, realize what's happened and slap each other silly)

Kish: Ew, I touched a girly boy!

Chi: (Cross vein popping out of forehead) (Is holding refrigerator above his head threateningly)

Kish: (screams like a little girl and hides)

Haku: Who's the girly boy now, huh punk!?

Kuroko: OKAY EVERYONE! MALL TIME!!!!!!!!!

Everyone: (splits up in different directions)

* * *

(AN): 1- The saying one kid at my school was thinking of using for his 8th grade quote, so disturbing, it goes like this… "Virginity is like a bubble, one prick and then all done…" ….one word, ew, anyways, we didn't want to make this chapter too long, and now this story is getting more story, which in a way makes it less random, but in another way it makes it even more random…oh well, we'll post the next chapter soon! Ja Ne!! (Also now may be a good time to watch more Ouran, and some Full Metal Alchemist if you want to understand the story more) 


	5. OMG! MALL TIME!

_Last Chapter_

_Kuroko: OKAY EVERYONE! MALL TIME!!!!!!!!!_

_Everyone: (splits up in different directions)_

**How Kish and Haku bond**

Kish: Haku, you have no idea as to where we are do you???

Haku: …no

Kish: WHY DID I LISTEN TO YOU?! EVERYTHING HERE IS PINK!!!

Haku: It's called Limited Too, but I didn't mean to get us here! Do you have a problem with pink!?

Kish: …I like green…how do you even know the name of the store?

Haku: (points to sign) I can read…

Kish: OoOoh, let's go to that store, it has black! (Points to dark looking store)

Haku: I dunno…

Kish: Aw, come on, don't be a loser!

Haku: Do you want your neck to meet my needles again?

Kish: Just come on! (Pulls Haku to store)

Kish and Haku: (Walk in store called Hot Topic)

Emos and Goths: (Glare at Haku's Pink Kimono)

Haku: Maybe this wasn't such a great idea…

Kish: Let's just look around.

**With Kuroko, Mew Chi, and Samara**

Kuroko: Let's go buy shoes!

Mew Chi: Hell no, I'm gonna go look in the weapons shop (walks in to scary pointy looking store)

Kuroko: There's no way I'm going in there…

Samara: I'm gonna go look in the demon store

Kuroko: I'll come with

**In Weapon Shop**

Mew Chi: (stares in wonderful amazement at the duel blades, shuriken, kunai, knives, guns, bombs, bayonets, poison, Yumiya, throwing needles, and very pointy pencils) OoOoOoOoOoO…..

**At the Demon Shop**

Kuroko: Look at that cute little demon hermit crab! (Pokes hermit crab)

Demon Hermit Crab: (snaps on to her finger)

Kuroko: Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff! Getitoff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Runs in circles) (Sticks hand in hot water)

Crab: (falls off)

Samara: You baka…

Kuroko: I'm gonna go look at the demons…without claws, the nice ones…

Samara: This is a DEMON store, NOTHING is nice!

Kuroko: (heads towards back of store)

Samara: Good riddance…I wonder if they have any of those tasty mice around… (Sniffs)

**Few Minutes Later…**

Kuroko: SAMARA!!! I NEED MONEY!!! GIMME SOME MONEY!!! I REALLY NEED IT!! PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE!!!!

Samara: O.o… uhh, care to explain just exactly why I should give money to you?!

**Back at Hot Topic**

Emos and Goths: (still glaring)

Haku: (nuzzles plushy of himself that he found in the store)

Kish: WTF…What are you doing?

Haku: I'm so cute in plushy form!!!

Kish: Haku, you need to act a little more…not girly, around these people…

Haku: (frolics around store)

Kish: v.v;; He's doomed…

Emos and Goths: Get out of here you sissy girl!!!

Haku (stops frolicking) (eye twitches) (fire in eyes) (glares at Goths and emos)

Kish: v.v;; they're doomed…

**A Few Seconds Later**

Haku: (wipes hands on kimono) I'm done here, let's leave.

Kish: 0.o (stares at emos and Goths lying unconscious on the floor with needles in their necks and other places of their body) (Inches out of store after Haku)

**Back At Weapons Shop**

Mew Chi: (puts huge mountain of weapons… lethal and not lethal…. like pencils, on check-out counter) Put it on my tab…

**Back at Demon Shop**

Kuroko: SAMARA!! PLEASE!!!!!

Samara: Why should I give you money!? Show me!

Kuroko: (leads her to back of store) I want this kitty demon! (Points to blue cat in cage)

Samara: I don't see why, it's not even that good looking…

Blue Cat: Hey there sexy (winks at Samara)

Kuroko: Hi handsome (winks and flips hair at blue cat)

Samara and Blue Cat: …no comment

Samara: I definitely won't lend you money for him.

Kuroko: Awww, but look how cute he is!

Blue Cat: (begins to sing 'I'm too sexy')

Samara: NO!

Kuroko: (sigh) Fine… (Begins to walk out of store and has tantrum)

Blue Cat: TAKE ME WITH YOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Samara: NO!!!!!!!

Kuroko and Blue Cat: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!! (repeats until Samara gets so annoyed she gives in)

Samara: FINE! HERE! (gives Kuroko money)

Kuroko and Blue Cat: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kuroko: (buys Blue Cat) YAY! I'm gonna name you Buru!!!

Buru: WTF…

Samara: Just keep that pervert away from me…

Buru: Awwwww…. you know you like me!!!!!

Samara: PHHH, Whatever!! Just keep walking!!

Kuroko: Let's go show Chi what I got!!!

**Back at The Weapon Store**

Chi: (just about to leave when she spots a flying eye which belongs to Gaara) Gaara eye, Kuroko is less than half a mile away! Run!

Gaara: (appears and runs right out of store only to collide with Kuroko)

Kuroko: GAARA-KUN! YOU CAME BACK FOR MEEEEE!!!!!

Gaara: NOOOOO!!! When will this hell end!?!?!

Samara: Hi there Gaara….missed me? (bats eyelashes)

Buru: (growls at Gaara) You tryin' to steal my woman!?!?

Samara: SHUT UP! I am not your woman!!

Mew Chi: (casually strolls towards Buru and stares at him)

Buru: (stares back)

Chi: (stares harder)

Buru: (glares)

Chi: (glares even more)

Buru: (finally blinks)

Chi: I WIN!

Buru: (grumbles angrily)

Chi: Anyways, WHO are YOU?

Kuroko: This is Buru, I bought him, he's my new demon buddy!

Samara: (grumbles) More like you used MY money to buy him…

Gaara: (Tries to sneak away while they're not looking)

Kuroko: (Catches him, glomps him, and nuzzles him)

Gaara: Oh for the love of –

Chi: Lets go find the other two.

Samara: Okay I'll come with you, I need to get away from the mental group

Chi and Samara: (head off)

Buru: (Notices and yells) Let me come too! (runs after)

Kuroko: (laughs evilly) Now it's just me and you Gaara-kun…

Gaara: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**With Chi, Samara, and Buru**

Buru: (catches up and walks beside Samara)

Samara: Touch me and you'll get your rump kicked!!

Buru: (purrs) Is that a threat or a promise?

Samara: (pukes a little bit in mouth and runs further ahead)

Buru: (Thinks to future) Our kittens will be beautiful!!

Samara: 0.o (Smiles at thought of Buru bound and gagged in a closet)

Mew Chi: THERE YOU TWO ARE!!! (Sees Kish and Haku at food court) And surprisingly you two didn't kill each other…at least…I don't think…

Kish: (head lying on table)

Samara: What happened to him?

Kish: Brain Freeze…GAAAAHHHH!!!

Haku: (lying under table twitching and writhing in pain) DAMN YOU ICEES! DAMN YOU TO HELL!!! (miffed)

Chi: Let's go, we need to leave soon!

Everyone: (Returns to Kuroko and Gaara at a Wedding Shop)

Kuroko: (Is looking at self in mirror wearing white wedding dress) Does this dress make my butt look big?

Gaara: Yes, very. (tied to plastic tree wearing Tux against his will)

Everyone but Gaara and Kuroko: 0.o

Buru: (Pulls Samara by the paw) Let's find a dress and Tux for our wedding!

Samara: NOOOOOOO!!!! SAVE MEEEEE!!!!

Chi: Sometimes it's best to just walk away… (Turns and pretends she saw nothing)

Kuroko: (sigh) Fine, we'll go wedding shopping later! Right now, we need to go to the Host Club!!!


	6. The Host Club!

_Last Chapter_

_Kuroko: (sigh) Fine, we'll go wedding shopping later! Right now, we need to go to the Host Club!!!

* * *

_

(Bus suddenly appears out of nowhere)

Everyone: 0.0

Kuroko: WOO! Let's go!!! (Gets in bus)

Everyone: (follows)

Gaara: I wanna drive (holds sand threateningly)

Everyone: (smiles and nods)

Gaara: (goes to bus steering wheel)

Everyone: (holds on to chairs for dear life itself)

Gaara: (thinks) _I wonder how to start this thing…?_

Bus: (somehow starts and moves…. 1 inch…)

Gaara: (thinks) _Yes, I got somewhere… _(Asks) How many Inches is it to get to the Host Club?

Chi: 5 miles…

Gaara: shortcut?

Everyone: NO!!!

Gaara: (gulps and makes bus go MUCH faster somehow) YES!!!

Samara: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Buru: Is this what you do everyday!?

Samara: YES! WE DO! And if you don't like it you should go back to the demon store!

Buru: But then I'd have to leave you Pumpkin!

Samara: (silence)

Bus: (screeches to sudden halt)

Kish: Why did we stop!?

Gaara: I don't know!! I didn't do it!!

Haku: The engine overheated…

Everyone: (looks at him) how do you know this?

Haku: My friend Winry from FMA told me (Points to Winry who is sitting at back of bus)

Everyone: 0.o How long have you been there?

Winry: (Doesn't answer, but begins to walk outside saying mechanical terms no one understands on how to fix the engine) (On her way out of the bus, whacks Kish in the head with a wrench)

Kish: (holds head in pain) What the hell was that for!?!?

Winry: Sorry…reflex…

Edward Elric: (Appears suddenly at entrance of bus) What do you mean reflex!?!?!?!?!?!

Kuroko: (sees Ed and starts to foam at the mouth, runs around in crazy circles, screams at the top of her lungs, pulls at hair, hyperventilates, then finally glomps Edo after 10 good minutes of that… then faints…)

Ed: (Runs away madly from unconscious body yelling something about rabies and runs in to Al)

Al: Nii-san! We need to go!! I found a job opening!!

Ed: (sigh) Don't tell me its another where I have to work as a maid in some crazy perver- (falls to ground unconscious)

Winry: (holds wrench proudly) (Then walks outside to fix bus)

Kuroko: (Almost drowns in pool of drool)

Buru: (smacks Kuroko back to consciousness) (goes back to bus seat with Samara) Look! I saved Kuroko, surely you must love me now!

Samara: nope.

Buru: (sob)

Winry: (Comes back in) Okay, the bus is fixed, we can go.

Kuroko: (stares at unconscious Ed and giggles evilly)

Kish: NOOOOO!! Now the short crazy ones are taking my fangirls!!!

Ed: (Automatically comes to when he hears that) Who you callin' short, BIG EARS!!

Kish: (sigh) Always with the ears…

Ed and Kish: (continue to fight when all of a sudden they both fall to the bus seat unconscious)

Chi: (Holding lamp above Kish's head)

Winry: (Holding wrench above Ed's head)

Kuroko: (won't stop staring at Ed)

Gaara: HA! A CHANCE TO ECSCAPE!!!! (Runs away whilst madly screaming)

Kuroko: (doesn't care about Gaara at the moment. Only stares and drools over Edo.)

Mew Chi: Well, we should get going….

Ed and Al: (Ed wakes up) Can we come with? We're looking for a job so we can earn some cash…

Chi: I dunno…the bus is kinda full alre-

Kuroko: (Shakes Chi) LET THEM COME!!! And if there's not enough room, I could just sit on Ed's lap (Evil fangirl chuckle)

Everyone: (Suddenly realizes that Gaara is missing) Where'd Gaara go?

Mew Chi: Heeeeyyyy… Ed, you're over 16, correct?

Ed: (still terrified over what Kuroko said) uhh… yea….

Chi: (Throws steering wheel to Ed) YOU'RE DRIVING!!

Ed: But I dunno how to drive!

Chi: I don't care!!!

Ed: …………. (presses random buttons trying to make bus start)

Winry: (sigh) Just let me drive…(Hits Ed in the head with a wrench and throws him to back of bus where Kuroko is sitting)

Kuroko: (says to self while throwing fist in air in triumph) YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYEYEASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!

Winry: (takes wheel and drives bus non-crazily)

Everyone: (gives a sigh of relief)

**Finally At Host Club**

Mew Chi: WE'RE HERE!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone: (confused)

Kuroko: (huggling unconscious Edo)

Everyone: (Walks in to high school and finds third music room)

Chi: (opens door and rose petals fly out) The flower petals! They burrrrrrnnnnn…..

Kuroko: OOOH… So pretty… (thinks) I'll have a flower theme for when I marry Edo…

Ed: (still unconscious)

Everyone: (walks in slowly)

The Host Club: Welcome everyone, to the Ouran High School Host Club!!

(Everyone looks at Tamaki except for Chi who is staring at the twins with hearts in her eyes)

Kuroko: (is sad) Crap… I have too many anime crushes…. (pause) I'LL HAVE THEM ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chi: (counts who shes a fangirl of) let's see, there's over 300 for Kuroko, so I won't even begin to list them. As for me, huh... (counts on fingers) Not too many…lets see…Shippuuden Naruto, Haku slightly, Takuto, and Hikaru…wow, that's not a lot.

Kaoru: What about me!? I look just like Hikaru

Haruhi: Not exactly

Chi: And Inuyasha!

Inuyasha: (Appears all of a sudden holding tetsuaiga over Chi's head threateningly) What did you say…?

Kagome: (Appears too) OSUWARI!

Inuyasha: N- (crashes to ground)

Kagome: He's mine! MINE!

Chi: (Backs away)

Tamaki: This is no way for young ladies to act, even commoners such as you, especially here, just take a seat.

Ed: (wakes up with Kuroko's fangirl drool all over him) Uhh… What is this?! EW!

Al: Hey Ed, I've heard that these "hosts" have a very fun job. They entertain beautiful young ladies!!

Winry: O.o There is no way…

Ed: Actually, I like the idea…. (Turns to Tamaki) Do you perhaps have a job opening here?

Tamaki: Hmmm… I dunno if I can let a commoner work here…

Haruhi: (cough, cough)

Tamaki: (sigh) Fine! You can work here! But on one condition, you and your brother have to cut your hair!!

Ed, Al, And Kuroko: NOOOOOOO!!! Not teh smexy hair!!!!!!!!

Inuyasha: haha…go long hair (flips hair girlishly)

Haku: I agree!

Kish: Yep!

Hikaru and Kaoru: (Appear behind Ed and Al holding scissors and having scary smiles on their faces, take Ed and Al to the BACK ROOM)

Ed and Al: NOOOOOOO!!! SAVE US!!!

Kuroko: (Tries to pull Ed and Al away from Hitachiin twins, but fails) NOT THEIR HAIR! NOT THEIR SEXY HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!

All of the FMA fangirls: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! (tackle twins and take Ed and Al away)

Tamaki: (sigh) Fine, they can keep the hair (mutters) Stubborn commoners…

Hunni: But they have to change their clothes!!!

Hikaru and Kaoru: (nod) Definitely (Pulls them to back room)

Kuroko: (Tries to follow)

**A Few Minutes Later**

Ed and Al: (Come out wearing blue high school uniforms)

Kuroko: heehee, you wear briefs

Ed: (blushes)… You stalker…

Buru: Do you have one of those in my size…? (points to uniform)

Samara: Aw, shut up

Kyoya: Now, get to work you two.

Ed and Al: ALREADY!?!

Everyone: (notices how Winry is trying to disassemble Inuyasha's tetsuaiga, despite Inuyasha's many protests)

Winry: Huh…how does this work, where does that pretty red light come from? (Hitting tetsuaiga with wrench)

Inuyasha: Duh-oh… N-nooo… that's (wrench hits tetsuaiga) DON'T TOUCH THAT!! (wrench hits tetsuaiga) NOOOOOO!!!! THAT BELONGS TO- (wrench hits tetsuaiga) …I give up…

Haku: (sips commoners coffee)

Tamaki: (walks to Haku's table) Hello lovely young lady, how may I, Tamaki, King of the Hosts, serve you today? (Kisses Haku's hand)

Haku: I'm a boy.

Tamaki: (suddenly wallowing in corner)

Kyouya: (Speaking to Ed and Al) Okay, you are going to try and go with the same approach as Hikaru and Kaoru. Observe…

Hikaru: (suddenly falls down and mound of plates falls on him) (Cries out in pain)

Kaoru: Hikaru! (Goes to brothers side)

Hikaru: (whispers in hushed voice) I (cough) don't have much time left…(cough) Just promise me one thing…

Kaoru: Whats that dear dear brother…?

Hikaru: N-never stop loving me…

Kaoru: Always and forever… (Holds brother in soft embrace)

Yaoi Fangirls: AWWWWWWWW!!!!

Ed and Al: 0.o You have got to be kidding…

Kyouya: (clears throat) I never kid…

Ed and Al: (groan and attempt to do the same thing, ATTEMPT)

**A Few Seconds Later**

Al: (Hits Ed over the head with a plastic tree)

Ed: WTF was that for!?!? (Hits Al over the head with a porcelain poodle)

Al: (whispers to Ed) We're supposed to be acting remember…

Ed: (whispers back) Ahh… riiiiight….

Al and Ed: (synchronized deaths)

Fangirls: (cry) NOOO!! THEY BOTH DIED?!?!?!?!

Ed: (angrily whispers) No you baka, I was supposed to die remember?!

Al: (whispers back) But Nii-san, I was supposed to die!! I thought we established this already; I'm the CUTER of the brothers so it would be sadder if I died!!!

Ed: Are you saying that you're better than me?!

Al: Well, I hate to brag, but I'm nicer, I don't have any problems with Winry or Mustang, and I'm TALLER!!!

Ed: (totally po'd and snaps) TALLER?!?!?!?!

(Brothers suddenly "come to life again" and tackle each other)

Ed: OW! You bit me!!!

Kuroko: Yum! Must taste pretty good!! (whispers) Al, you have no idea how lucky you are…

Fangirls: WTH…

Kyouya: I think they missed the point…

**Later**

Kish: Can we go now?? (whines)

Kuroko and Mew Chi: NOOO!!!! THIS IS FUN!!!

Kish: (cowers in fear)

Chi: (huggles Hikaru)

Hikaru: (smiles and thumbs up)

Kuroko: (huggles the other 7 hosts, excluding Haruhi)

The other 7 hosts: (weak chuckles and thumbs down)

Kuroko: (gives Ed an "encouraging" cough… threatening smack on the head) SMILE!!!!!

Other Customers: (Glaring at Kuroko)

Inuyasha: (Whilst arguing with Winry about tetsuaiga, loses balance and falls on her)

Kagome: (Suddenly comes back in and sees Inuyasha and Winry) (clears throat)

Inuyasha: I-I Can explain!

Kagome: (cross vein at fist) (drags Inuyasha by the ear all the way back to the feudal era)

Inuyasha: KAAAGOMEEEE!!!! (Digs claws into floor)

Kyouya: Well… this should be costly… (Fumbles through notebook)

Ed: (draws alchemy circle and claps hands) (big shiny flash of light) There, all finished!! The floor is fixed!

Tamaki: It looks brand new… Oh, and I see that you've added some polish to it as well!

Renge: (tries to come up through floor) (maniacal laughter) Hey… uhh… guys…. its not working…. uhh… (Weak chuckle) What's happening?! (high powered motor breaks) No-ho-ho-ho-hooo!!!

Haruhi: uhh, Ed, you alchemized the floor so that Renge is stuck down there….

Kyouya: (evil chuckle) Yessss…..

Winry: huh… I should learn from this Kagome girl… she uses some pretty frightening tactics… (Evilly glares at Ed and Al)

Mew Chi: Well, we have to leave soon….

Kuroko: Bu-but… (Sob) I like it here….

Mew Chi: heyyy…. why don't the hosts just come with us?!!

Hunni: That sounds fun!

Kish: I object!

Naruto: (suddenly appears wearing a white wig and a gabble) You do not have the power to object! Overruled!! (Disappears in a cloud of smoke)

Tamaki: But what of our customers??

Shippo: (Appears out of nowhere with several logs) Fox Magic!! (logs turn to resemble host club members) THERE!! (Runs away)

Kish: Alrighty-then!!

Mew Chi: Let's go have some fun!!

Samara: uhh… where do we go now?

Tamaki: Let's go get some commoners coffee!! TO THE STARBUCKS!!!

Kish: (sits in corner pouting, and sings llama song)

Everyone: (Joins in)

_here's a llama  
there's a llama  
and another little llama  
fuzzy llama  
funny llama  
llama llama  
duck _

llama llama  
cheesecake  
llama  
tablet  
brick  
potato  
llama  
llama llama  
mushroom  
llama  
llama llama  
duck

i was once a treehouse  
i lived in a cake  
but i never saw the way  
the orange slayed the rake  
i was only three years dead  
but it told a tale  
and now listen, little child  
to the safety rail

did you ever see a llama  
kiss a llama  
on the llama  
llama's llama  
tastes of llama  
llama llama  
duck

half a llama  
twice the llama  
not a llama  
farmer  
llama  
llama in a car  
alarm a llama  
llama  
duck

is THIS how it's told now?  
is it all so old?  
is it made of lemon juice?  
doorknob  
ankle  
cold  
now my song is getting thin  
i've run out of luck  
time for me to retire now  
and become a duck

_(PS, we do NOT own the llama song)_

**Later at Highschool**

Customer: (Talks to log resembling Tamaki) I think we've really connected, you know? Its like we were meant to be!

"Tamaki": (no answer)


	7. ASK BURU!

Time for our short chapter, ASK BURU!

Buru: (Wearing a robe, sitting in large armchair, smoking a pipe, looking very intellectual) Good day everyone, I am Buru, as you all should know by now, unless you're a nit-wit, then you might not. I'm here to answer any questions you might have about fangirl chronicles. So you can send in questions about us via review and have it answered next time. (Looks through letters) Ah! I see one from Gaara!

* * *

Dear Buru,

WTF!? Why is Kuroko so freaking obsessed with me!?

Signed,

Gaara

* * *

Buru: Ah, such an interesting question! Well, let's look at the possibilities. Maybe it's your many facial expressions… (Looks through pictures of Gaara, all in which he has the same frowning expression) Um…well…maybe it's because you can get along so well with others! (Sees clip of Gaara nearly killing Rock Lee) um, maybe not that…ah ha! Maybe it's just she thinks you're cute! (Sees picture of Gaara's face half ugly shukaku'd) Um…I guess it will just remain a mystery, maybe she's just weird, but her true fangirl crush is Edo.

Gaara: (watching TV program where this is being shown) I'm going to strangle that cat…

Buru: On to our next question! Would you look at this, it's from my love, Samara!

* * *

Dear Buru,

Why don't you just shrivel up in a hole and die!?

"Love"

Samara

P.S.: I found that camera you put in the shower, you are soooo dead!!!!!!! (Insert cusswords here)

* * *

Buru: (chuckles) you know she loves me….anyways, I'm sorry, but if I shriveled up in a hole and died I wouldn't be able to be with you, see you later Honey! Now, our next letter is from … KISH!

* * *

Daijo-buru!! (lol, yes, it's straight up gangsta'!!)

Well, I have this problem, the short annoying anime guys… (cough) Ed…are stealing my fangirls, what should I do?

From,

Kish

* * *

Buru: What an unfortunate turn of circumstances, I am sorry about your loss of fangirls. Well, one thing you could do is…

Kuroko: (flies in to room with a broom) FOR THE LAST TIME! I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOU BORROWING MY CLOTHES WHEN I'M NOT LOOKING! (looks at robe and steals it back) (Breaks pipe in half) And no smoking! It's bad influence for the children who read this and it will turn your lungs black and kill you due to lung cancer!!! (gives him a lecture on the dangers of smoking and shows him disturbing scary pictures of lungs gone bad)

Buru: But…but- they blew bubbles!

Kuroko: (smacks him in the head with a broom and storms out)

Buru: uhh…I think we'd better end our show now; we'll be back next time to answer your questions on ASK BURU!

Samara: (storms in carrying baseball bat)

Buru: Hi Honey!

Samara: D-I-E!!!!!!!!!!

Buru: (laughs nervously) (makes motion for camera man to turn off camera)

(You see Samara lunge at Buru before camera dies)

Kish: (pops out of nowhere) Cue the credits!!

Starring:

Buru

Filmed by:

Naito

Remember, if you have any questions; tell us by review to have them show up next time on ASK BURU!


	8. Kuroko, and her fangirly attacks

**(At the Blossom Inn: 1:46 am) BTW, Blossom Inn is where Mew Chi, Kuroko, Samara, and Buru live**

Mew Chi: (walks in room) Phew, that was some party!!

Kish: I-I don't feel so…. oh geawd…. (Runs to bathroom)

Samara: (mutters) No more Sake for you, you little alcoholic alien!!

Kuroko: Chi, are you sure it's ok if everyone stays over? (Glares at Inuyasha who is cowering from the TV remote)

Tamaki: (fearful) Where will we sleep?! On the floor???!!!

Kuroko: I don't think we have enough beds…WE'LL HAVE TO SHARE!!! (winks at Ed)

Ed: OMG… hell no….

Chi: You liar, we have enough be-

Kuroko: (Stops Chi from finishing. binds her and throws her in a closet) (laughs nervously)

Everyone: 0.o …

The Twins: We call the room with the mini fridge!!

Tamaki: Hey… I wanted that room…

Haku: (shrugs)

Chi: I hate my life…

Everyone: (goes to bed except for Chi, who is stuck in a closet and Kish who is sprawled on the bathroom floor)

**In Ed's Room**

Kuroko: (Laughs evilly and watches sleeping Edo)

Chi: (Yells from closet downstairs) Kuroko! I know what you're about to do!!! Don't touch him! He bends metal and can sue!!!!

Kuroko: Awwwww….

Ed: (wakes up) Good thing Winry and Al didn't come with us or that poor Kuroko would be toast… burnt toast….

Chi: (Yells from closet) Anyone…? Help…

**Back at Kuroko's room where Buru is staying**

Buru: (Tosses and turns)

Kuroko: What's up?...

Buru: nuthin'….

Kuroko: (falls asleep and snores like a lawn mower running over a shoe)

Buru: (thinks) _Oh, that's gonna help a ton…_ (Covers head with pillow) I guess I'll see what Samara's up to… (Snicker)

**In Mew Chi's room where Samara is sleeping**

Buru: (sneaks into Samara's bedroll)

Samara: (opens one eye)

Buru: (thinks) She'll never even-

Samara: (Kicks Buru so hard he crashes through wall)

Buru: Oh the pain… oh the agony…. woe is me… (Lying in Kuroko's room right next to a snoring Kuroko) (K.O.)

Samara: (mutters) Stupid pervert!!!

**Where Inuyasha is sleeping**

Inuyasha: (miffed) I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY MADE ME SLEEP IN THE DOGHOUSE!!!... OUTSIDE!!!...

Chi: Well, you sleep outside all the time!!! …and you ARE a dog!! Oh, by the way, mind getting me out of this closet?

Inuyasha: Phh, that lucky Kagome… she gets to stay in her world while I'm stuck here… outside… in a cramped box…. alone…. by myself…with no one there…with the thunder…and the lightning…and the mice…(shudder) and Kuroko… (Glares at Kuroko who is right in front of doghouse)

Chi: (Yells from closet) Bad Kuroko! Bad! No cookies for you! Back away from the dog house!!

Kuroko: Awwww… (Trudges away in the general direction of Tamaki's room)

(Huge echoing yell heard from house which strangely sounds like Tamaki)

Tamaki: NOOO!!! Kuroko! What are you doing!? (crash) Come back here with those!!

Kuroko: (comes running outside laughing maniacally) Heehee, you'll never get your pants back!!!... (Runs to fangirl shrine)

Inuyasha: (Blinks) Never mind, I'm happy outside…

Chi: …anyone…? This closet's kinda small…hello…?

**In The Morning**

Kish: (Wakes up in bathroom) My head hurts…wait…what happened to my pants!?

Tamaki: (Wearing Kish's pants) I borrowed them…

Kish: Why…? 0.o (Scared of what twisted answer may be)

Tamaki: Never let Kuroko near your clothing…she's crazy…

Kuroko: (Comes in nuzzling Tamaki's pants)

Kish: I see your point…

Kuroko: (Sees pants-less Kish) (Nosebleed)

**In The Kitchen**

Twins and Inuyasha: (Cooking breakfast)

Inuyasha: (Cutting tomatoes with Tetsuaiga)

Twins: (Throwing eggs at each other)

Inuyasha: Good thing Kagome taught me how to make these so called…ooom-eeee-lets

Twins: Do you mean omelets?

Inuyasha: … huh?

Everyone else except Chi: (Sit down at table)

Twins: (Serve omelets)

Everyone: Itadakimasu!!

Tamaki: I'm really starting to like this commoner food.

Inuyasha: I'm pretty sure we were supposed to put the egg shells in…

Everyone: (Spits out food)

Kuroko: MMM… Bishie flakes sure are nummy! Ah, a Bishie in every bite! A good part of a fangirl's breakfast! They're bishielicious!

Inuyasha: (sob) now I know how Kagome feels when I reject her bento… (bursts out crying)

Ed: Why is my picture on that cereal box?!

Kuroko: (hides glue) uhh…. I dunno... (?)

(Rumbling noise heard from closet)

Chi: (Bursts out of closet wielding chainsaw with a maniacal look on her face) I called for help all night…and no one came to help me!!!!! (Splits table in half. fire in eyes)

Everyone: (backs away)

Kuroko: Hey… I was looking for that chainsaw…

Chi: (Notices Tamaki wearing Kish's pants) I don't even want to know what happened last night… (Yaoi thoughts pop in to head) …ewwww

Kish: (runs in wearing towel) ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK!!! Tell Kuroko to give Tamaki's pants back!!

Kuroko: No, they're mine now!! NEVAH!! (Inhales smell of pants and runs away screaming "MINE!!")

Ed: (Holds on to his own clothing protectively, knowing that he would most likely become the next victim of the psychopath's attacks)

Haku: …I'm scared…

Chi: (Takes out strait jacket and giant cookie) Kuroko, come get the cookie… Kuroko! (Holds up cookie)

Kuroko: (Drools up a waterfall and grabs cookie and nibbles it)

Chi: (While Kuroko isn't looking puts strait jacket on her and throws her in closet)

Kuroko: (shouts through closet) Heyy… let's play seven minutes in heaven!!... Oh Edo-kun!!! Come heeeeere!!!

Ed: (backs away as far as possible from closet)

Kyuubi: (appears in a puff of smoke)

Everyone: uhh…where's Naruto…?

Kyuubi: (Snicker) He's a little busy right now…

(Make out noises coming from closet)

Everyone: (Looks like they're going to be sick)

Kuroko: Heyyy…you're not my Edo-kun…

Naruto: Kyuubi! You bastard!!! Why'd ya do that… dattebayo?! (Crashes through closet door with lipstick marks on face)

Kuroko: (follows)

Ed: Thank god that wasn't me in there…

Naruto: (sniffs air) Do… Do I smell RAMEN???!!!

Inuyasha: (runs out the door with the ramen he just cooked)

Naruto: HEY, GET BACK HERE!!! I WANT SOME!!! (Follows Inuyasha)

Samara: Well, that was weird…

Buru: (stumbles downstairs) Samara, you almost put me in a coma!!!

Samara: (chuckles evilly)

Haku: Am I the only sane one here?!

Kish: Well, I personally think that any guy who can wear a pink, floral kimono is uber insane!!

Spongebob: I LOVE FLOWERS!!! (Explodes)

Everyone: WTH… Spongebob?!

Kuroko: Anyways… I need to go take a shower… (Turns towards Ed) I have Watermelon shampoo… Wanna join me????

Ed: No.

Kuroko: Fine, don't join me, I'll just have a nice, relaxing shower with Tamaki's pants!!! (runs away inhaling pant's scent)

Tamaki: I'm never gonna get those back, am I?

Kuroko: (yells triumphantly) OF COURSE NOT!! (laughs maniacally) MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	9. Funland!

Mew Chi: First of all, I'm changing my name to Naito, since I'm no longer obsessed with TMM.

Kish: (Feels very much insulted)

Kuroko: Okay…then I want to change my name to Mrs. Elric!

Ed: No.

Al: (Nervous laugh)

Naito: Anyways, today we are going to…FUNLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ed: Let me guess, I'm drivin', huh?

Naito: Yep, everyone on the bus! (Once again bus appears out of thin air.)

Tamaki: (sigh) I finally got my pants back…. (Glares at a very angry Kuroko)

Kuroko: You tied me to a flagpole, bribed me with a cookie… a very tasty cookie, and threatened to sell my entire collection of inflatable furniture on Ebay!!

Hikaru: My Lord, why didn't you just buy another pair of pants?

Tamaki: I LOVE THOSE PANTS!!! The stretchy fabric… the many pockets…. ahhh, so many good memories with those pants….

Kaoru: …

**On the bus ride to Funland**

Naito: Too bad Haku had to go to work today…. he sure likes his job…. taking care of underprivileged monkeys….

Inuyasha: (smirks) you said there was… "Bowel-ing" at this "Fun-land"?

Twins: do you mean bowling? Where you try to knock down pins with a heavy ball?

Inuyasha: hmm… I shall try this …. "Bowling", you speak of….

Al: hey Ed, wanna try laser tag? It sounds very interesting!

Ed: laser? What's that?

Al: (shrugs)

Twins: We wanna try that too!!!!

Naito: (looks out window) we're heeeeere!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ed: (Crashes through wall of indoor amusement park) Wha-?

Buru: (turns toward Samara) Hey sugar, there's a tunnel of love there…. shall we-

Samara: (smacks Buru in the head with plastic tree) no.

Buru: (Whines) Samara-Chan, you're always so mean to meeeee….

Samara: Get used to it.

**In Funland**

Kuroko: Hmm… if only Gaara-kun was here with me… too bad he's on vacation…

Gaara and Kankuro: (walk through doors of Funland)

Gaara: So then I was like, OMG!! Lee! Give me back my eyebrows (sees Kuroko)

Kuroko: (drool)

Kankuro: and this is… who??

Gaara: RUN KANKURO, RUUUNNN!!! SHE HAS RABIES!!!

Gaara and Kankuro: (blast away, crash through wall)

Kuroko: (sigh) Oh well… time to terrorize Edo-kun…

**With Naito, Inuyasha, and Kish**

Inuyasha: I think I understand this game, so what I have to do is throw the ball down the gutter then slide on my stomach down the lane and knock down the pins before the ball reaches the end, right?

Naito and Kish: …no.

(Too late… Inuyasha's sliding…)

Naito: 0.0 …uhh…

Inuyasha: AHhHhHhHhHhH!!!!!!! I DON'T LIKE THIS GAME!!!

Kish: (sigh) not like that baka! (Teaches Inuyasha)

Inuyasha: OH! I have a great idea!! (Slices bowling ball in half with tetsuaiga and throws ball like a Frisbee towards pins but misses… and hits the plasma TV screen above)

Bowling Staff: (Notices broken TV) (Runs toward their lane) you better have enough money to pay for that!!!!

Naito: 0.0 RUN! (Runs away)

**With the twins and Elrics**

Al: Nii-san… I'm scared….

Ed: (trembles at many red lights shining at him) Th-these children wield weaponry… why do people put they're lives in danger to play this game?!

Children with Lasers: (Laugh evilly)

Hikaru: (Gets hit with laser and falls to ground pretending to be injured)

Kaoru: HIKARU!!! (Runs to brother's side)

Hikaru: I-I've been hit; I don't know how long I have before-before…

Kaoru: My… My brother… (Takes Hikaru's hand in his own)

Hikaru: Kaoru…

Kaoru: Hikaru….. (Tears in eyes)

Everyone else in room: (Busts out crying)

Hikaru: (whispers) now?

Kaoru: Now!!

Twins: (Jump up, shoot everyone, and run away laughing)

Everyone: (out of game) GRRRR…

Ed: Al, I know how we'll get through this! (Claps hands) (Laser gun turns into rocket launcher)

Al: Good thinking nii-san!

Children: … AAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! (Run away)

**After game**

Twins: YESS!! Laser master!!! 25,000 points!!

Elrics: -27 points…figures…

**With Kuroko and Tamaki**

Tamaki: (Cowers from Kuroko)

Kuroko: (stalking Tamaki from behind a plant)

Tamaki: you know I can see you, right?

Kuroko: (evil chuckle) those pants will be mine again… just you wait!!

Tamaki: (tries to run)

Kuroko: (glomps Tamaki) GOTCHA!!!!!!! YOU CAN'T RUN AWAY FROM ME NOW!!

Tamaki: (has foreseen this and super-glued his belt to his pants)

Kuroko: (fumbles around with belt but does not succeed in the de-pantsing of Tamaki)

Old Lady: GET A ROOM!!

Tamaki: KUROKO, GET OFF ME!!

Kuroko: NOOO!!! (Attaches to Tamaki's leg)

Tamaki: GET OFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!!

Kuroko: (bites Tamaki's leg)

Tamaki: (screams and runs around frantically) GETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kuroko: (holds on with teeth tightly and flies behind Tamaki)

Tamaki: (trips over a lawn mower and crashes to the ground with Kuroko landing on top)

Kuroko: since when did you have that freckle on your (chuckle) cheek?

Old ladies: (scream) PUT SOME CLOTHES ON YOU NEANDROTHOL!!!!!!!

Tamaki: (Realizes that he is fully de-clothed, face turns red and runs behind a giant poplar statue of Masaya….smacks statue with lampshade.)

Kuroko: (river of drool, jumps behind statue)

**Back with Buru and Samara**

Buru: I'm glad you could join me in this lovely restaurant Samara…

Samara: UNCHAIN ME THIS INSTANT!!!!!!! I'LL KILL YOU!!!! I'LL HANG YOU BY THE TAIL!!! I'LL SKIN YOU ALIVE!!!! I'LL MAKE YOU SWIM THROUGH A LAKE OF FLAMES AND MAGMA!!!!!!!!

Buru: (blushes) Awww… I love you too honey!!

Waiter: (comes with food) (stares at demon cats) (is shocked, but still puts their food on the table) Enjoy your food…my, what a cute couple you two are…

Samara: (glares at waiter) you're on my list, buddy

Waiter: (grins and inches away)

Buru: (starts to eat food happily)

Samara: (glares at food which she cannot reach because her paws are chained to the chair and sighs)

Buru: Oh, that's right; you can't eat, can you? I know! I'll feed you!

Samara: (cross vein) (finds strength to pull apart chains and tackles Buru in an angry rage)

Buru: Wait, aren't I supposed to be the one on top in this relationship?

Old lady: GET A ROOM!!

Samara: (slaps Buru across face and flounces away)

Buru: NOOO!!! COME BACK MAH LOVE!!!!!!! I MISS YOU ALREADY!!!!!!!! (Sob)

Kuroko: (runs through restaurant screaming fangirlishly) I HAVE COLLECTED TAMAKI'S PANTS, SHIRT, _AAAAANNND_ UNDERGARMENTS!!!!

Tamaki: (runs in holding palm tree to block his…yeah) GIVE THOSE BACK, you psycho!!!

Kuroko: NEVA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! …by the way, are you covering something or are you just happy to see me? (Stares at palm tree)

Tamaki: (blushes madly) (eyebrows twitch)

Buru: O.o… Dude, get some pants…..

Manager: No shoes, no shirt, no service!

Kuroko: (sigh) Fine…(Throws Tamaki his shoes and shirt)

Tamaki: And my underwear too…

Kuroko: (stuffs underwear in her mouth)

(Naito, Inuyasha, and the rest of the crew run in, stares at Kuroko)

Naito: …uh..Hi…

Kuroko: (muffled voice due to underwear) Huuuhhh!! (Translation: Hiiii)

Naito: Um, Kuroko, you don't have in your mouth what I think you do…right?

Kuroko: uuuhmmm huh!!! (Translation: Uh-hu!)

Naito: (looks over to Tamaki) Um, ew.

Tamaki: (blushes) shut up!

Naito: BAD KUROKO! Drop them! (smacks back of Kuroko's head) Give him back his underwear!

Kuroko: (coughs and spits out saliva-covered garment at Tamaki)

Tamaki: (picks up underwear by corner) …ewwww…it's got the plague!

Manager of restaurant: Fine…but! (points at Buru) You! Get Out!

Naito: (Looks behind to see bowling staff running after them again) Um, guys, we gotta run!

Kuroko: (gets off cell phone) But my other fangirl friends are coming!

Bowling Staff: (Getting closer)

Naito: I don't care! We have to run!

(Mob of squealing fangirls run in to restaurant and glomps Tamaki, who may I remind you is wearing a very minimal amount of clothing)

Tamaki: SAVE ME!

Everyone else: (Get in to bus)

Naito: We have to hurry, we'll come back for you later Tamaki, good luck! Don't die!

Kuroko: Bye bye! Have fun!

Tamaki: (cries and watches as bus drives away) (Drowns in sea of fangirls, and grasps for salvation through the air)

* * *

Naito: How come we haven't gotten a question for Buru yet? Hes getting bored, someone, ask him a question! 


	10. Memories of Ninja School

Our story begins at the Blossom Inn (FYI; Kuroko, Naito, Kish, Buru, and Samara live on the 5th and highest floor. Lots of people enjoy staying here but Kuroko usually takes the customer's belongings and puts them in her mouth...then we have to pay them back for their saliva'd, and chew mark ridden items.)

Naito: Hey Kuroko! Look what I found in the closet!! (pulls out dusty box.)

Kuroko: Whoa... I haven't seen these in a while...

Buru: What are those??

Kuroko: (Takes out object and licks it) MmMmMm...Still tastes nice...!

Naito: Will you stop licking it! It smells like old people!

Samara: Are those what I think they are!?!?

Kuroko: Yeah... (Drool)

Naruto: Hey! That's just like mine!

Sasuke: (Walks in) (Stares at objects) Oh my god... KuRoKo!! WTH IS THAT??? WHYYY????

Kuroko: I-I can explain!

Kish: Uhhhhhh...

Haku: Hm, I like your's Naito!

Kuroko and Naito: (Fix their newly found ninja forehead protectors in mirror)

Naito: (glee) I like mine!! Mist 4 evah!! I have the same one as Hakuuu!!!!

Sasuke: KUROKO!!! WHY ARE YOU WEARING AN ANTI-LEAF INSIGNIA???

Kuroko: Welllllllll...

(Flashback)

Iruka: And as you can see the kunai is a very important tool to the ninja, it has many uses, such as-

Naito: (Randomly squeals) AHH!! I can't believe he did THAT! (squeals some more whilst flapping arms wildly)

Iruka: (Stops lesson and turns towards Naito's seat)

Whole Class: (Stares at Naito)

Naito: Umm... (laughs nervously)

Iruka: (Stares at Naito's text book) You're not _really _reading "Ninja weapons of mass destruction"...are you? Tell me young lady, WHAT _ARE_ YOU READING?

Naito: Of course I am! I happen to find Kunais very interesting!

Kuroko: (In seat behind Naito) (Looks over her shoulder) OMG! THAT'S MY FAVE MANGA! Can I borrow it when you're done?!!

Naito: (Gives Kuroko a killer glare)

Iruka: (Picks up textbook in front of hidden manga) (ahem) Graduation is soon, you'll never pass if you keep this up. (Stares at Kuroko who's flirting with cute looking student in corner)

Naito: (Groans) Iruka-sensei, why do we need to know about weapons and such anyway? We've went over this a billion times.

Iruka: You weren't paying attention any of those times either... (Glares at Kuroko who's sneaking up behind cute student)

Kuroko: (Bites cute students ear)

Naito: . . . (Stares back at Iruka) You gotta admit, I'm not _as_ bad as _her_.

Student: ... (mouths) "Save... me..."

Kuroko: (Takes out shuriken, kunai, throwing needles and seven foot long sword) You can't escape me now!!!

Naito: Kuroko! Bad! Bad fangirl! Let him go!

Iruka: Naito, Kuroko, see me after school!

Kuroko: (Winks) If you want to see us _that_ bad...

(Bell rings and everyone leaves except Kuroko and Naito)

Iruka: (Sigh) Naruto paid more attention than you two... anyways, what I need to tell you is that the hokage has asked me to give you an early graduation, so we can finally get rid of y-I mean...since you guys already know your material.

Kuroko: WOOOHOOOO! NO MORE BORING NINJA SCHOOL! Wait... (goes to emo corner) (remembers the fun times she had torturing the hott boys in class)

Naito: (Looks at Iruka skeptically) Well, even though I do know your game, I must agree, that we do know the material, just because we don't pay attention in class does not mean we don't study at home.

Kuroko: (Looks up from magazine) Study what now??

Naito: (smacks forehead) Correction, doesn't mean _I_ don't study at home.

Iruka: Fine. Prove it.

Naito: (Clears throat) Well...

A **ninja, **忍者, is an assassin or spy in Japanese culture, usually trained for stealth. Appearing in fourteenth century feudal Japan, and active from the Kamakura to modern time, their roles may have included sabotage, espionage, scouting, and assassination missions, perhaps in the service of feudal rulers (daimyo or shogun).

Iruka: ...Well, what did you learn from today?

Naito: Well, since I knew that was our next chapter, I read it the night before and researched some stuff, here's what I know.

There are many types of Kunai, short kunai, long kunai, narrow bladed types, saw-toothed types, and wide bladed types. In some cases, the _kunai_ and the _shikoro_ , a wide bladed saw with a dagger-type handle, are hard if not impossible to distinguish.

The ninja could also thrust the point into a tree and use it as a handhold. The reason the kunai had loops at the bottom was also so they could attach two of them together and use two at a time. Aaaaannnd-

Iruka: THATS ENOUGH! TAKE YOUR FRIGGIN FOREHEAD PROTECTORS AND LEAVE!

Kuroko: Um, (blank look) I know stuff too...Naruto's pretty hott! And Kunais are good for changing lightbulbs. (Tries to look very intelligent)

Iruka: (Throws random forehead protectors at Naito and Kuroko) GET OUT ALREADY!

Naito: But I haven't told you what I know about-

Kuroko: I'M TEH WAFFLE NYMPH!!!!!!!!!

Iruka: (smacks forehead) (Kicks them out...literally)

(Naito and Kuroko sitting outside school)

Kuroko: TEH SHIZ!!!! I have Itachi's forehead protector!!! I'M GONNA GO SHOW AAAAALLL MY FANGIRL FRIENDS!!...(pause)... Uhhhh... (counts) Well, that leaves Naito! ...NAITOOOOOO!!! COME SEE MY-

Naito: Kuroko, I'm right here, I already know.

Kuroko: Fine, take the fun out of everything...killjoy...

Naito: Heh, this isn't a leaf symbol...It's...mist? (leaps up) YES! I always loved the village of the mist! W00T!

(End Flashback)

Kuroko: Hmm...I think I'm calmer now then I was back then.

Naito: Are you kiddin meh? You may be even worse. At least back then you didn't steal pants!

Kuroko: ... (pause) (randomly glomps Naruto)

Naruto: Okeh...ew.

Haku: Don't you feel bad that they only let you graduate just because they wanted you gone?

Kuroko: BALSAM WOOD OF DoOoOoM! (pause) Wait...they only let us graduate because they wanted us gone!?!?!?!

* * *

Naito: Okay, the info about kunai and ninjas was from wikipedia, with some slight editing.

Kuroko: Dang it! I thought you actually knew all that stuff!

Naito: Technically, I do know it _now_...

Kuroko: Pff, fine. cheater...


End file.
